70. Evil Protestantism (1)
Ah-young’s eyes widened.
Her bed felt softer than usual.
Ah-young jumped up in surprise, leaping out of her bed and landing on the floor as swift as a feline, and quickly reached towards the sword attached to her waist. However, all she could grasp was her pajamas.
She looked around her.
It was a familiar sight yet felt unfamiliar at the same time. She didn’t even get a sense of how many years it had been since she last stepped into this room.
There were clothes scattered all over the place, major books used as table mats for ramen, and a cell phone with its alarm ringing.
This was her bedroom.
"… I’m back." She muttered with a blank expression.
Looking at the date, she had gone back to the day before she was abducted to Midgard.
Tears welled up in her eyes.
Ah-young soon burst with joy. However, as she let out cheers, she unknowingly released enough energy to destroy her fluorescent lamp as well.
‘… I still have my abilities?’ She thought but was soon interrupted by the dimensional store popping up, which then revealed a message.
[I decided to leave your power with you and deposited sufficient funds in your account. Have fun with them. Oh, and I’ll also send you text messages from time to time.]
It was from Lee Jin-woo, the God of Evil.
She already knew the existence of dimensional stores. Before she regressed, she saw Odin use it. It was quite a strange concept for her, though, since only the master of a dimension or a being that had reached a certain rank could use it.
Ah-young tilted her head as she checked her account. Soon enough, her jaw dropped slowly, followed by a scream escaping out of her lips.
"Oh my god!"
In Korean currency, he deposited nearly 500 billion won in it. By converting the dimensional gold coins, she could easily and instantly send the money directly to her regular bank account.
She became a billionaire overnight.
Even if she were to transfer all of it at once, the government wouldn’t be able to find her since she was under the God of Evil’s protection, nor would the bank find it strange. Besides, he told her to contact someone if any problem arose.
He had the same name as the president of the United States, who caused quite the turmoil because of his sudden visit to Korea.
Amid his dazzlement, her phone vibrated. A friend had chatted with her, asking her if she planned on going to class today.
It was so plain and heartwarming that it brought tears to her eyes. Nevertheless, she didn’t feel like going to school at the moment.
Instead, she put down her cell phone and turned on the TV, which aired a children’s program since it was still early in the morning.
[Roar! I am Odin! I will turn all humans into puppets!]
[Aaah! Kids! An evil being has appeared! Help me call Red Stub Man!]
[Help, Red Stub Man!]
They depicted the Norse supreme god as evil. When the MC and the children shouted ‘Red Stub Man,’ smoke erupted and soared, and a man in red tights jumped through the screen it created.
[You dare trample on the hopes of little kids?! Take this! Red Stub Beam!]
[Arrgghhh! I’ll be back, Red Stub Man!]
When he crossed his arms, a red stub spewed out and clung to Odin’s body. Screaming, he disappeared under the stage.
[Children! Save your pocket money! Don’t be greedy like Odin!]
[What about illegal bonds?]
[You’ll be in big trouble!]
As with any children’s program, it ended with a lesson.
Albeit a very practical one.
"Lee the Red Stub Man?"
No matter how she looked at it, the ending was similar to Odin’s fate.
Ah-young remembered what happened in the desert. A Seized Possession Tag was slapped onto his forehead, and the Asgardian deities received the same punishment.
The God of Evil’s face popped into her mind.
She could never forget his smile.
Ah-young conducted research using her smartphone, finding the entire scenario far too weird. However, when she searched Norse mythology, the first to appear was the God of Evil’s portrait, which was quite accurate. He held Astrafe and Gungnir in it.
The myth had changed!
The Norse mythology she knew was now filled with stories of her experiences. Some parts had been removed or changed, but the overall context was the same.
The most shocking aspect about it was how it painted the ever vicious Loki as the God of Evil’s loyal assistant. However, there was something else that caused her mind to go blank.
A documentary video titled ‘Traditional Culture of Denmark’ on MeTube.
[In Denmark, a red stub is given at the coming-of-age ceremony, a tradition passed down from a very long time ago. It means never to borrow money for personal reasons and to take responsibility for your own actions. They often used it as a tourist product, but most Europeans consider it their biggest fear, leading them to ceaselessly be wary of it. On the other hand, some also use it as a talisman containing immense power to destroy deities.]
Lots had truly changed.
While looking for information related to the God of Evil, Ah-young soon found out that a museum dedicated to him had opened near her house. It exhibited everything that was related to his myth and legends.
Ah-young put her clothes on and came out of her room in her studio-type apartment. Although she had 500 billion won, it hadn’t really sunk in yet.
She took out one of her dimensional gold coins.
It was the same size as her thumb and had the God of Evil’s face engraved on its golden surface.
She opened her dimensional store.
It offered a wide variety of items, including gigantic ships. However, Ah-young knew all the money she had wouldn’t stop her from getting into an accident. Upon stumbling upon a product that simply transcended common sense, she paused to think for a moment and finally closed the shop altogether.
Exiting her apartment, she headed to the museum, noticing a large church on the way. Its attendees seemed to be extremists, considering they attended nearly every day and would even knock on people’s front doors to evangelize them.
Their outfits were oddly unique, too. They all wore black robes.
As Ah-young passed by, they approached her.
"Have faith in the God of Evil, sister. Do good in this world, and you shall reach the heavens above. Let him guide you to the right path."
"Attend the masses! Save your entire family by going to church yourself!"
"Make a lot of money and spend it for yourself and your family! Religions that ask for money are no more than cults!"
Such preaches would’ve normally annoyed her so much she would just pass by them without paying them any heed, but she couldn’t do it this time.
She turned her head to look at the pastor holding a microphone. When he spread his arms, the evangelists stared at him.
"Let us remember that the God of Evil has taken away all the evil and darkness in our world to provide us with light and righteousness! Akmen."
"Today, we remember Faro, one of the God of Evil’s archangels. She rules the underworld as he ordered, promising us heaven for as long as we live with goodness in our hearts."
Akmen was a mixture of multiple languages, meaning, "If you believe in the God of Evil, it will surely happen."
The scene was far too different from what Ah-young had seen before. Even the church’s design itself was different. Its symbol was now an X made out of Astrafe and Gungnir.
Staring at it blankly, she eventually felt obligated to accept the church newspaper the evangelists distributed.
‘I really was with him…’
More accurately, she spent quite a lot of time with him, and he even gave her a lot of money.
Moreover, he asked her to contact him often.
According to her research, about 2.6 billion people worshiped the God of Evil. And quite a few countries had declared Evil Protestantism as its state religion.
The pastor she met was also a member of the Evil Protestantism Church.
The bibles found in different cultures were all remarkably similar in content, and many scholars considered them a mystery. The more she researched, the more she felt the need to become a member of the God of Evil’s religion.
The president of the United States was also his ardent believer.
Regaining her senses, she resumed her walk towards the museum.
It was gigantic, perhaps because the publishing company that made the World Tree app had apparently invested in it. Although it was still early in the morning, there were already quite a few people in it.
They were mainly the God of Evil’s devout followers from other countries, but kindergarteners and elementary school students were also among them.
It looked like a group outing.
Ah-young took a brochure and read through it, learning that the God of Evil myth was most common in Greece, Northern Europe, and Egypt. However, its members claimed it wasn’t just a myth but actual history that happened. In fact, even this museum used the word "history," not "myth."
She followed the guide in her brochure to tour through its many installations and exhibitions of relics collected from all over the world. Even Zeus and Poseidon were mentioned in some of the displays, but they remained relatively the same, unlike the Nordic and Egyptian parts that had completely changed.
She noticed papyrus with hieroglyphics written on it. The interpretation read:
[Don’t borrow money and don’t lend money. However, if you are in a hurry, use a God-of-Evil-certified bank.]
There were also humongous paintings made out of colored stone fragments. They were only reproductions of the original works, however.
Checking out one of them, she found the God of Evil with his arms outstretched and Odin on his knees before him. Next to him was a female warrior.
Title: Blessed Female Warrior
2nd century BC (Estimated)
The God of Evil’s female warrior.
A warrior who represents humanity in the God of Evil’s myth. Although she faced difficulties because of Odin’s schemes, she aided the God of Evil in emerging victorious in their war. After defeating them, she ordered Odin and several other gods to serve mankind for eternity.
It is said that after she won the war, the female warrior made a wish to the God of Evil to return her to her home planet. Currently, traces of the female warrior are being discovered in Asia.
She knew immediately she was the female warrior they were pertaining to.
They hadn’t discovered her name yet, but it seemed she was revered as a saint by the God Of Evil’s church.
There were also artifacts relevant to the story about Thor and the Sphinx. Their mystifying battle had apparently been upheld as a tradition in Northern Europe and Egypt until now.
Despite battles being fought with straw hammers, they still caused casualties every year.
In some countries, it had even developed into a form of professional sports. As for Korea, it treated it as a traditional sport.
‘I don’t think anything can surprise me now.’
Just looking at the replicas made her immune to strange and weird displays.
Scanning through the brochure, she found an article about the most famous relic in Egypt, which depicted the most decisive role in integrating the Greco-Roman, Norse, and Egyptian mythologies into the God of Evil’s. It was so renowned that it appeared in every textbook.
She went over to its installation.
Despite being confident that nothing could shock her anymore, Ah-young lost her composure again.
In front of her was a gigantic statue with a different design from those made based on Egyptian and Norse mythologies. Its clothes were more akin to Ancient Greek outfits.
Uranus was standing proud. He had his hands on his waist, and he had thrust his lower body forward, magnetizing everyone’s gazes down to his long, colossal rose.
It looked like a cannon.
Even more surprising were the statues around him. Unlike him, they wore Egyptian attires, but they were in the same pose. More importantly, although smaller than his, they also had large cannons attached to them.
Title: Blessing of Uranus
Uranus and the Egyptian warriors fired male energy to bless the Earth and cleanse it of evil spirits.
Fortunately, it didn’t feel as obscene as looking at the David statue. On the contrary, it seemed immensely sacred, which was most likely why it became famous.
She saw an employee diligently elaborating the displays to elementary school students. She looked like a foreigner, but she sounded fluent in Korean.
An Asgardian goddess…
With a blank expression on her face, Ah-young returned to her house and opened her dimensional store, which also had a feature that allowed her to message the God of Evil.
She sent him one.
[God of Evil.]
[Hmm? Is everything okay?]
She hesitated for a moment, then replied.
[Does Uranus really have… You know, that?]
[How do you know about that?]
A rather long silence fell.
They didn’t exchange messages for a while.
* * *
The Northern World now belonged to Jin-woo, and he had sent Odin and the Asgardian deities to Earth with their abilities sealed, leaving only their immortality untouched. This way, even if they were to die in an accident, they would be sent back to Earth immediately from the underworld.
They had to work until they had paid off their debt.
Since they all agreed to the abduction of Earthlings and war against the Western World, they were all accomplices to Odin’s crimes.
Jin-woo asked Richard to take care of them and treat them harshly.
‘The myths have changed again.’
According to Ah-young’s messages and the Internet, they had been completely altered, just like the Greco-Roman mythology. Not only that, but his religion had also become the largest on the planet.
There had been more changes than he expected, but they did bring with them multiple benefits.
Terrorism and illegal debt had decreased a lot compared to the past. Although fanaticism had now become a problem, it wasn’t detrimental since it only made the people put more effort into their social lives according to the God of Evil’s doctrines.
Yoo-na smiled at him.
"How does it feel to bear all the evil and darkness of the world?"
It felt oddly refreshing.
He became a god a long time ago, but he didn’t really feel like he was one. However, it finally sunk in when humanity began worshipping him.
Having cleared his schedule, Jin-woo finally returned to Earth after so long. Just recently, they had launched a manned rover to Mars, the development of which was carried out under G&P’s name.
It had been engraved with the patterns of the God of Evil’s eyes, which had apparently been customary since ancient times. It was mainly used as a means of praying for their safety.
Turning Mars into another Earth would be easy if they mobilized ships, but Jin-woo wanted to proceed slowly.
"I’ll be back."
"Alright. Please be careful."
Jin-woo first visited the Western World. Although Nitocris ruled it, it was treated as part of his territory. Still, he didn’t intervene with it all that much and just provided them support whenever needed.
It was simply too boring for him to focus on.
Horus had descended into the underworld to help.
His plan to save the Western World’s people was going smoothly. With Jin-woo supplying them with food and water, death caused by starvation and dehydration had practically gone down to zero. However, this place was still riddled with yang.
Before him gathered Bread Jam, Loki, Maze, Luna, and Nitocris. It was quite odd to see them in the same group, but they worked well together. Loki became quite gloomy for a while recently, but he had brightened up since then thanks to Bread Jam and Nitocris.
"Hahaha! I am Loki, the god of mischief, fire, and wind!"
The five of them were playing board games together.
It was quite a heartwarming sight. However, when he appeared out of nowhere, they hurriedly overturned their game as if they had just been caught doing something illegal.
"Oh, I didn’t notice you’ve arrived," Nitocris said, breaking in cold sweat.
"We’ve finished all of our works for today."
Jin-woo simply smiled and nodded, holding Triana in his hand. The Western World had always been short of water, which was precisely why he came over.
It was time to resolve that issue.
Jin-woo activated his weapon’s ability, creating a river that cut through the desert before finally merging with the sea he also just conjured.
The God of Evil had created yet another miracle.
[With a lift of his staff, the God of Evil created the Red Sea and made the Nile River flow.]
Theologians claimed that he created those two bodies of water, and not without basis. It was quite a well-founded argument.
‘I should visit Hephaestus.’
He had already gathered all the demonic powers in the World of Gods. All that was left was to make the smith of the gods extract them from the weapons that served as their shells and revert them to their original form.
Once that had been accomplished, the door to the Eastern World would automatically open. Jin-woo had to be prepared for that.
Wherever the Devil’s body slumbered, it would be no ordinary place. He had this feeling it would unleash more trouble.
Jin-woo headed to Olympus.